The Gun Counter

Are you tired of being constrained by "male" articles of clothing with no basis in logic? Are your manly bits yearning to breathe free? Then you need a Utilikilt! Utilikilts are the perfect garment to liberate yourself from the oppression of the pantrachary. Women will swoon at you, men will want to be you, and everyone will want to know whose wearing that kilt!

Utilikils are made of only the finest of materials, hand crafted by Seattle folk craftsmen who have been making kilts for millenia. They provide almost unlimited space for concealed weaponry such as handguns, knives, rocks, nunchucks, grenades, short swords, ninja stars, broken bottles, brass knuckles, thermonuclear warheads, and rocket propelled chainsaws. The wide belt loops allow the wearing of a traditional styled belt fashioned from the skin of your enemies and 3 pockets provide plenty of storage space.



Utilikilts are good for a number common outdoor and inddor activities. These Include:

Work:


Fighting the English:


Zombie Apokylispe:


Fighting the Fuzzy Wuzzies:



Remember that William Wallace wore a kilt when he defeated the British at Stirling Bridge. Connor MacLeod wore one when he dueled the Kurgan. When the tide turned at Helms Deep utilikit was there. When the Tannhäuser Gate was shattered Utilikilt was there. Utilikilt was, is, and always shall be.

Kilt Observations:

1) For the full effect you really need to wear the kilt and the kilt alone. Underware gets in the way of the effect.

2) Kilts attract attention. People may think that you work at a theme bar, a forest ranger, boyscout, cop, a member of some obscure military unit,or are from another country (then again I get that without the kilt...).

3) Walking into the frozen foods section of the supermarket on a hot summer day becomes quite the experience.

4) Avoid having girls sit in your lap. They will undoubtedly discover just how much you appreciate them, whether you want them to or not.

5) You will suddenly discover why girls like skirts. However miniskirts will remain a mystery.

6) Certain precautions must be taken while wearing a kilt. One must be careful in how they sit and lookout for stray gusts of wind.

7) I think I might have to get a tattoo and multiple piercings now. Not that I want to but I seem to have violated some sort of natural law here by wearing a Utilikilt and not having any bodyart. You might choose and outward method of self expression, but me? I'm crazy on the INSIDE!

8) Why are all these people staring at...oh that's right. Hmm...the 1911 probably doesn't help either. Oh well.

I guess it is an improvement on the last garment trend you attempted to start.... Beyond that, I really can't say.

Netpackrat wrote:I guess it is an improvement on the last garment trend you attempted to start.... Beyond that, I really can't say.

You get a very definite "Amen!" on that one!

The body armor in the first photo definitely sets the stage.

On another note, Kommander wore his kilt to the OC dinner in Phoenix on August 8th. Didn't notice the girls swooning though.....

I admit, had I any drop of Celtic blood in me, I might be tempted to wear such a thing while working around the place... Not in public though... Unless you have a brogue, or are competing in Highland games/strongman...

Dunno... my "boys" like a little support...

Asked the tourist, "Is anything worn under that?"

Replied the Scotsman, "No. Everything works fine."

Netpackrat wrote:I guess it is an improvement on the last garment trend you attempted to start.... Beyond that, I really can't say.

Dare I ask?

Cybrludite wrote:

Netpackrat wrote:I guess it is an improvement on the last garment trend you attempted to start.... Beyond that, I really can't say.

Dare I ask?

A certain kind of chaps.